SOLUTIONS HERE

SOME COMMERCIALS CAN BE FIXED.

For more Information
on my 20 plus years
making films and videos,
please visit Alex LOGIC.
I am also an ideas person,
and an excellent collaborator.


I believe I am talented at taking an existing idea and enhancing it. Coming up with an improved ending is in part caused by having something of quality to work with. I acknowledge that I am a helpful cog in an intricate series of decisions that have already occurred and nothing more.



This commercial is easily fixable. I'd keep the same set but ad a pretty girl that drops a snickers exactly in between the two men, (a take off on two racers street racing and the girl dropping the handkerchief to start the race). The two mechanics each lunge for the snickers. Each mechanic catches the opposite end of the snickers bar with their mouth and pulls away from the other, resulting in the interior chewy caramel goodness stretching across the entire engine area.

The thin caramel strand starts to sink towards the top of the engine so the two mechanics start slurping the chocolaty caramel strand so it does not touch the engine, just before their lips touch, the car emits a huge puff of smoke and the two break apart. The mechanics separate and go back to work. Close up of the girl as she shakes her head.



This is a fascinating commercial. I really liked Toshiba's concept, it reminded me of my film school days when we could come up with endless stairs story lines.

I also love the soundtrack. It has a nice repeatability to it. Everytime I see the commercial the sound adds to it.

It must also have been fun getting all of those extras together, and then actually giving them something to do besides standing around and smiling.

This Toshiba commercial also reminds me of the Stu Hagman IBM commercials of the 80's. Lots going on, lots of people involved as we follow the main hero, Charlie Chaplin.

When I was an Academy of Television Arts and Sciences Commercials Internship Winner interning at Film Fair in the mid 80's, I had the honor of visiting the Universal Studios set where Stu Hagman was directing his IBM Chaplin commercial. But whereas Stu Hagman won back to back director of the year awards in the 80's, this commercial falls short at the end.

The ending of this video leaves me wanting more, and not in a good way. By studying the final shot, we can actually backwards engineer a possibly better commercial.

Consider these two commercial ending alternatives, both require that a little bit more time is available for a new ending, but that should not be a problem since there are so many action shots early on and cutting them shorter or taking a couple of shots out should not really affect the overall commercial.

---------ALTERNATIVE ENDING------------

After our hero breaks through the 'barrier", he looks back, types something onto his Toshiba keypad, and the glass barrier is broken, or simply disappears (a more elegant solution than another explosion) and everyone else can now advance.

Suddenly the advancing group picks up speed and we have another rumble race starting, with our hero leading the way.

I really liked this new ending at first but then it dawned on me that one problem with the computer age is that others can copy the innovators creation, and in essence copy and dilute the leading edge with their own knock off version. Why would the one person who broke through want to help everyone else so quickly that they immediately chase him down?

---------SECOND ALTERNATIVE ENDING--------

But then I came up with a second version. The hero breaks through the barrier, turns back, types something on his Toshiba laptop keyboard, and a portal opens up.

The crowd of people who initially were left behind walk through the portal, one by one, satisfied that they can move forward, but also acknowledging the hero for creating the portal for them.

In essence, the hero of the commercial has become the IT division of Toshiba trying to get ahead of the crowd, so they can properly assist the crowd. (this is getting deep, but that's what I do)

Sort of like "Portal to the People!".

----------THIRD ALTERNATIVE ENDING---------

Once I began backwards engineering this Toshiba commercial, I came up with another version that slightly changed the tone of the entire commercial.

I won't go in to the third version as it requires a more in depth rewrite of the entire script.

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Yes, it's supposed to be a powerful commercial, but it so misses the mark that I won't even reveal why.

Good soundtrack, good editing, bad commercial. It happens. This is one commercial I would love to have the opportunity to heal.

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As dumb, inappropriate, and misguided as this commercial is, it could have EASILY been fixed.

Add in a title card right after the man takes a swig from the bottle, PLEASE DRINK RESPONSIBLY, cut to the man kissing his daughter, cut to a second title card THIS IS NOT DRINKING RESPONSIBLY! Then cut to the man in repose in his home, enjoying a glass, sans daughter. Final title card, drink responsibly, close up on bottle.



I like this commercial. We really needed to see an overhead wide shot of the skid marks on the pier at the end.

  PROBABLY NOT FIXABLE.

For more Information
on my 20 plus years
making films and videos,
please visit Alex LOGIC.
I am also an ideas person,
and an excellent collaborator.




A completely unnacceptable commercial premise at the beginning stalls this car commercial, however this commercial manages to save itself somewhat with a clever ending.

However, would you really want your car associated with cheaters? Funny spot, just not for your car. I am assuming this commercial was banned. I think this is one of those commercials that really doesn't work.


What were they thinking? The line about "don't worry, there's no sugar in it", falls flat.

I don't know if this commercial was actually banned, but I'm not feeling it. In this instance, probably not a fixable commercial, however, a tie in to a Spiderman movie or DVD release could work.

Spiderman swoops in and saves the guy as he is bopping down the side of the building and drops him in line to buy a spiderman dvd or to see the next spiderman movie.

A wide shot reveals a series of men with those stupid yellow suction cups on their hands, all waiting in line for the spiderman event, as spiderman disappears into the distance.